What is Gottman Method Couples Therapy?
Gottman Method Couples Therapy combines the knowledge and wisdom of
more than three decades of Gottman research and clinical practice.
Through research-based interventions and exercises, it helps couples
break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and
intimacy in their relationships. Gottman Method Couples Therapy is a
structured, goal-oriented, scientifically-based therapy. Intervention
strategies are based upon empirical data from Dr. Gottman’s three
decades of research with more than 3,000 couples. This research shows us
what actually works to help couples achieve a long-term healthy
relationship. Gottman Method Couples Therapy was developed out of this
research to help couples:
- Increase respect, affection, and closeness
- Break through and resolve conflict when they feel stuck
- Generate greater understanding between partners
- Keep conflict discussions calm
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Research shows that to make a relationship last,
couples must become better friends, learn to manage conflict, and create
ways to support each other's hopes for the future. Drs. John and Julie
Gottman have shown how couples can accomplish this by paying attention
to what they call the Sound Relationship House, or the seven components of healthy coupleships.
The Gottman Theory For Making Relationships Work
- Build Love Maps: How well do you know your partner’s inner psychological world, his or her history, worries, stresses, joys, and hopes?
- Share Fondness and Admiration: The antidote for
contempt, this level focuses on the amount of affection and respect
within a relationship. (To strengthen fondness and admiration, express
appreciation and respect.)
- Turn Towards: State your needs, be aware of bids
for connection and turn towards them. The small moments of everyday life
are actually the building blocks of relationship.
- The Positive Perspective: The presence of a positive approach to problem-solving and the success of repair attempts.
- Manage Conflict: We say “manage” conflict rather
than “resolve” conflict, because relationship conflict is natural and
has functional, positive aspects. Understand that there is a critical
difference in handling perpetual problems and solvable problems.
- Make Life Dreams Come True: Create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk honestly about his or her hopes, values, convictions and aspirations.
- Create Shared Meaning: Understand important visions, narratives, myths, and metaphors about your relationship.